We got to know each other when we studied together long ago. She lost a loved one and thought about contacting me to share the news. Although we were not as close as we had been during the studies, we kept in touch. To get the call and spend time with her, just hearing her out and offering what consolation I could, was as much an honour for me as I hope it was a help to her. We had not always agreed on some issues, but the differences were not hindrances to friendship. I recalled when my Mum died, and she was a terrific support when we talked. Those occasions marked out the value of friendship even as time and different experiences had distanced us.
They were his friends. They’d been with him for over three and a half years. They got to see him up close and personal. Near the end of his time, he went as far as to let them know they were his friends. It’s why his heart was so heavy that one of them was about to betray him. It was the mark of friendship that he was keen to restore his friend after being denied three times.
Seeing Jesus and his interactions with those he called friends tells us much about friendship. It’s a relief to get that insight when I consider how my actions and attitudes affected some of my friends over the years. It’s helpful not to dwell on the flaws and failings but rather to take responsibility for what I do wrong and learn from the experience to do better in the future. Likewise, I don’t want to be the type who rules people out because of a failing. That’s not to make me a walkover or exercise due wisdom in dealing with relationships. It is to say that I depend more on the grace of God to be merciful to others.
The value of friendships on the journey of life cannot be underestimated. The love we share and the support we can offer are so valuable that we can see why God created us to be relational beings.
I am grateful to have a friend in Jesus. I am glad that He makes it possible for me to tell Him all about my problems, frustrations, exhilaration, and even some random, trivial thoughts. That relationship took time to develop, and I’m often amused at how Christians struggle to share this aspect of what it’s like walking with Jesus. It’s as though they don’t take Him seriously in His invitation to a relationship that, among other ships, is a friendship.
I get the impression that the struggle is down to seeing Jesus as many things, but a friend is a complex concept to grasp. It’s not helped by approaches to friendship that are more about what we see around us and using that to shape our idea of Jesus rather than just taking Jesus for who He reveals Himself to e. The wonder and joy of a friendship with Jesus is what it does to inform our approach to friendships. The delight and thrill of friendship with Jesus is genuinely having someone there at the most challenging times in life—someone who will rebuke and chastise as well as encourage and console.
I am not the greatest friend in the world, for sure. I still have so much to learn about friendship, and I desire to learn about it. The basis is knowing who my real friend is and who inspires me to value good friendships as they emerge.
For His Name’s Sake
C. L. J. Dryden
Shalom
Life With CD 